some words before the big two one

• Oh hey this is exactly an hour and 33 minutes before the day when my Facebook is gonna (hopefully) flood in happy birthday messages and stuff. And where could be a better place to wait for that precious moment than this depressive blog that I swear my emotional life on right?
• Haha ok no more sarcasm, I'm gonna try stepping in the new day with a positive attitude as I've really been drowned in deadlines and lots and lots of things that required me to have to communicate with people so much to the point where I'm starting to put my thoughts usually only for private things on such people and things as well. And not until this afternoon I think when my mom came back with her apple cinnamon cake that honestly didn't taste much like an apple cinnamon cake, still good though, did I even think about turning 21.
• Is it even OK to freak out? Cause I really do right now. This feels almost like taking a test, partly because I did just take one of the most intensive tests and am still preparing for other two big ass ones, but the tension is real. One reason is because I honestly don't think people's gonna enjoy the cake, cause I seem to be the last standing person on the face of Earth that likes a cinnamon cake, and just the thought of seeing people like not wanting to eat the cake that my mom put so much work into just makes me nervous. Ugh this is just a show I hate a show why can't it just be like me inviting the teachers to have a bite and then that's it. Please no singing no clapping and stuff I only receive gifts haha. But really, I feel extremely awkward when put into such situations. It creeps me out just by thinking about it gahhh
• So, I'm just gonna make a summary just to remember this day, the day before I turn 21.
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• Age: 20 and 364 days and 22 hours and 40 minutes, according to my laptop
• Occupation: student, editor, tutor
• Amount of close friends: 5-6
• How was your day? Just ended this horrid German class with that obnoxious teacher, got scolded by the boss for messing up an article, received two basillion birthday wishing text messages from all kinds of shops, planning on deleting them all.
• What did you wear today? Hmm what did I wear? My trusty ol' white shorts that make me look like a guy but so comfortable I had to break down the barriers and my trusty ol' sweater from Oasis. No underwear. Blue Nikes.
• Current hair occupation: slightly ombre, almost ridiculously long and the hair ends are a true nightmare haha
• Dating occupation: what do you think?
• Missing anyone? Yes actually. One thing I still have to work on. Why are you in Canada?
• Things achieved this year: still managed to keep the job, got rid of those who needed getting rid of, participated in things I never thought I'd participate, got the chance to get to know more about more people, made valuable friends, knew a teeny tiny little bit how to play guitar, took up doodling again after what seemed like a thousand years, opened another blog, finally convinced my parents that a Macbook is a good idea.
• Things to crave for next year: a trip to Germany, come back from Germany and still be able to be friends with all my friends, still maintain a habit of writing a blog, no more romance bullshit and hurting myself, better hair ends, no more nail-biting (T.T), GRADUATE, meet more people, be less stupid and finally put my foot out of my mouth, be adequate in the TestDaF, control anger, give more gifts to people, send more postcards to people, still love everything that I do if not like now then even more, put even more passion in everything, and most importantly, meet as many little dogs and cats on the streets as my heart can desire.
• Love yourself more Schammm!
• Another reason to freak out is the fear of missing anything important in this post, and then when it turns tomorrow adding things to the post won't mean anything anymore.
• I think this should be it for now. I'll report more tomorrow. Have a wonderful sleep world.