Yoghurt cup #47

tumblr. I'm obsessed with food photos. Bonus a photo of the cutest kid ever had to grow up to be the hottest man.

• I feel like there's a stranger in the house. Although i force myself not to think like that, it just evolves naturally on its own. You know when you're trying to get to know someone in a superbly short period of time or the time is corrupted once in a while and in the end all you have is an overload of information, you still realize you don't know anything about them at all. I don't think it's just me, i think this is mutual. I actually was gonna write 'between us' after mutual but i think we're so cracked up to even being put in the same pronoun like that.
• Sometimes i think single-satisfying outcome results aren't ALL that we need in life. Especially if it involves forcing, even the slightest sign of it, people into doing it. No i'm not talking about sex, i'm talking about building a healthy familial relationship around. I have to admit i'm pushing people away from me when i see a slight deformity or differentiating character, but this is unacceptable in close term, especially when it happens in a lowly-populated familial size. Building a relationship, that's what matters. This is a less serious case of having to choose between inheriting colossal fortune and being with someone you love. Actually as i write it down, it doesn't even bear the slightest resemblance. It's just bullcrap.
• The entire foundation of this 'thing' that has been going on is bullcrap, no matter what way i put in into.
• I'll take the blame in this and say that i chickened out and backed off a bit, but for a moment there when he's not around and i could get my head straight, i did give the thought a serious consideration.
• Fuck it i'm making things two million times more complicated than it really is.
• The more i think about how mom found out about me dissing the goddamn Philosophy teacher the more irrelevant it seems. What are the odds of my photo with about 20 comments pop up on the dashboard of someone who haven't been on facebook forever, and what have they been doing, gathering back-to-back reviews about first college impressions? I've tossed & turned thinking about how bad my words could've been, since i deleted the facebook page and no longer want to participate in that manipulative world of stalkers and tallywackers, they couldn't have been that bad i swear. I didn't curse, i think i stopped cursing in my native language a while ago, and what i said could've been a normal little sarcastic conversation we were having everyday if we were in high school. A little under professional if you masters want to put it like that. I love pulling out the 'we're fucking teenagers and we're allowed to act like careless freaks til we turn nineteen' to throw at people's faces as a legit excuse to get out of it, basically defending myself from my own judgements. But i've been living with mine for the past two days, a little worried that she's gonna find out and try to do something to me in class. But after a few burns i got going through high-school phase my skin's pretty tough now and as i'm writing this i just realized i'm not even afraid of that anymore. What the fuck anyway.
• A thing that needs more finger-crossing than the final destination of the news is that in my indulgingly stupid moments i shared this blog with some people. Now i have to sit around hoping none of them have any connection with the freaking mess i just described up there. I don't wanna lock this blog anymore than i want to sit down and watch season four of Gossip Girl.
• But seriously, what the hell have they done with the witty and amazing script that was absolutely to die for in season one and two??? The books stops, you stop. Now all they do is to dress up actresses and hope that the million-dollar budget on wardrobe is gonna keeps some viewers around. Pathetic!
• Absolutely-no-music-to-listen-to. i must give Regina Spektor and The Doors a shot!
• Rained. Woop woop.
• It's still extremely hot though. What is made of this land???
• Going to get some stationery this afternoon, but it looks like it's gonna rain again.
• I want a MAC blush.